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May 27th, 2017-Uncertainties

Published May 28, 2017 by jillamatt

***Jill’s ‘letting go’ Diary***

This is part of a series of posts (ordered by Dated Titles) where I am recording my thoughts and emotions as we tackle getting rid of all of our possessions.  From the day that I came up with this idea, to sell everything and travel the world, I have recorded my thoughts on certain days where I feel like writing.  These are real time, and not edited (except for grammatical corrections.) 

It’s hard to believe that it has almost been a month since my last post. Time has been slipping by like a river, flowing all around us, but simultaneously, sweeping us downstream with it.

We are being carried along by the river.  Like we are just robots in motion, with something else guiding us and pushing us along.

My mind is on auto pilot. Constant lists run through my head:

  • Things we need to finish on the house before we list it for sale. (I’m currently drywalling my kitchen, that we are still obviously using. FUN TIMES!)
  • Things we need to get rid of. (Another yard sale is coming up on June 3rd.)
  • Things we want to do before we leave.
  • Places we want to visit, friends we want to see and connect with, one last time before we go.
  • Things we want to give to specific people before we go.

These thoughts, and many more like them, race through my head all day, even as I continue to run my own business, which is just starting it’s very busy season.

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Just recently I have started to find myself fielding some pretty intense and interesting questions from people about what we are planning.  It’s almost like it is somehow starting to be real to people.  Like maybe, just maybe, they thought we were bluffing, but now it is actually happening.

I was asked the other night, around a campfire, “So how do you feel about the uncertainties?”

After processing the question for a second, I croaked out a very caught-off-guard and shaky “ooookaaaayyyyy.”  (I couldn’t have sounded more insincere if I had tried.)

This, of course, was met with giggles and comments around the fire like “that’s not sounding very sure”, & “ya doesn’t sound like it.”

Without hesitation, although slightly embarrassed by my response (not my typical stoic self), I said “Well yeah, of course I’m scared shitless.  I’m definitely scared, but many great things have been accomplished by people who have faced their fears.”

And it’s true.

The hilarious thing about my response to the question, I now realize, is that my response ITSELF was uncertain.

I thought about this question for days afterwards.   Being the psycho analyzer that I am (mostly of myself), it bothered me that I had had a response like that, so seemingly unsure, and I needed to do some deep thinking to explore how I really did feel about the uncertainties.

“How do you feel about the uncertainties?”

It’s such an interesting question, for starters.

How do any of us feel about uncertainties?

My Dictionary app defines Uncertain in these ways:

  1. not able to be relied on; not known or definite. (an uncertain future)
  2. (of a person) not completely confident or sure of something.
    “I was uncertain how to proceed”

I bet there are VERY few people who do not experience some sort of uncertainty in their every day lives. We all carry around some kind of worries about things that MAY OR MAY NOT play out in our futures. We all second guess our decisions, uncertain if we have made the right ones.

Nothing is guaranteed. 

Most of us move through life with some general idea of what may come in the future. Whether it be goals that we have, or dreams that we want to fulfill. As most people busily plan out the details of their future, they are unconsciously aware that our “plans” may or may not happen.

Nothing is CERTAIN.  

Uncertainty pertains to those people who live in places for many years and are comfortable with their surroundings, AND it pertains to those who choose to go traveling, and can find comfort in their surroundings in far off lands.   It really is not picky with whose mind it occupies.

When I was asked the question, in that moment, I think I took it as a question where you either answered A) I’m okay with the uncertainties, or B) I don’t like the uncertainties.  And without trying to sound like I am defending my shaky response, I did my deep thinking, and decided this;

Not liking uncertainty really has nothing to do with a decision such as this. A decision like the one we have made, to sell everything to go traveling, is EMBRACING uncertainty.   I’m not exactly saying that I ‘like’ uncertainty, but I’m willing to open my life up to it.

The uncertainty of this plan, is what makes it exciting. It’s what causes my heart to flutter in my chest when I picture myself in this new reality that we are creating for ourselves.

Living with uncertainties, can for some, be debilitating. But I believe that it’s what lies out there, AMONGST the uncertainties, that shapes us as people. It’s what keeps us on our toes. It’s what creates our character.

How we react to the uncertainties that hit us on a constant basis, is what makes us the people we are.

The more we can drag ourselves away from the certainties, the more we grow.  Period.

And so, I am now ready to answer the question properly.

How do I feel about the uncertainties?

I say “BRING ‘EM ON!”

** Thanks for reading!  This is part of a larger group of blog posts about us letting go of all of our possessions to go traveling.  If you would like to read from the beginning, click here.**

To learn about where I have previously traveled, click here.

To see my blog post menu, click here.

It's how we embrace the uncertainty - Quote

When nothing is sure, everything is possible

April 30th, 2017- Costa Rica bound!

Published May 1, 2017 by jillamatt

***Jill’s ‘letting go’ Diary***

This is part of a series of posts (ordered by Dated Titles) where I am recording my thoughts and emotions as we tackle getting rid of all of our possessions.  From the day that I came up with this idea, to sell everything and travel the world, I have recorded my thoughts on certain days where I feel like writing.  These are real time, and not edited (except for grammatical corrections.) 

Wow!  Things seem to be falling into place all around us lately!  We just found out last night that we got a house sitting gig in Costa Rica, just South of Manuel Antonio, from November 1st to December 30th. It’s a very quiet and un-touristy part of Costa Rica, which is perfect for us.

I have been back and forth via email with the owner of the property for the last couple weeks. Initially she contacted us to see if we were available from September 1st to December 30th. I explained to her that we were in the process of selling everything and that we likely wouldn’t be ready by the beginning of September.

She wrote back to tell me that although they prefer to get one set of people for the whole 4 months, they have also split the term up in the past into 2 segments. So I told her that if she could find someone for the first half, we could certainly be available for November/December.

Well, she did just that, and in the blink of an eye, we now have a skeleton of a plan forming, which, in some deep seated way, is comforting to know.

I can’t help but laugh, however, as I read my last “Letting Go Diary” post about Plans and Planning.  In it, I resigned myself to the fact that we really didn’t have any specific plans, and that stressing out and worrying was not going to get me anywhere but to being burnt out.

However, when we secured this house sitting position, it also all-of-a-sudden made this whole scheme that we have concocted, VERY REAL!  Suddenly we DO have a plan, suddenly there ARE goals to achieve.  Suddenly we have something very real and concrete to work towards.  And in some strange way, it has made us super excited, and has brought us both much comfort.

Playa Matapalo

Playa Matapalo

Even though, I must say, I do like the feeling of just heading out, and not really knowing what is around each corner, I am also very aware that this will be a fabulous way to truly unwind from this hectic life that we live, and will give us breathing room when we get there, to figure out our next moves.

It also provides us with a goal, with some structure, and with something to truly look forward to!

PURA VIDA BABY!!!

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PURA VIDA:

Spanish for “pure life.”

The law of the land in Costa Rica. The expression is used in many forms, from a greeting, to a synonym for “excellent.” Ticos follow this lifestyle and are some of the most wonderful people on earth. A synonym of “hakuna matata.” Life is wonderful; enjoy it.

“Pura vida!” (Damn right!)
_________________

 

YARD SALE!

Another milestone was completed today as we held our first official yard and plant sale.

Plants are halfway down and through the gate. Forgot to take a picture of them!

It was a bright sunny spring day, and lots of people came out. All told we sold approx $1000 worth of stuff, which brings our overall total to just over $7000.

This is some of my random artwork that I have done during the span of 11 years living here.

 

The hoards of people waiting for the sale to begin!

However, there is still lots of stuff to go yet! We haven’t even begun on our kitchen stuff, tools, or garden equipment.

I must say though, although we still have lots of stuff to sell, our shoulders both feel much lighter with the amount that we have sold. It’s like we have been carrying around some kind of burden that we didn’t even know existed, and as those layers peel off, we are seeing and realizing our dream begin to manifest itself in our lives.

Tomorrow officially marks the beginning of the “busy” season for me in the house painting world. I have clients lined up from now until the end of July at least.  Chris has been busy with his Landscaping already with tons of spring pruning to do, but he is also part time working in his tattoo shop.

So our time will be precious, and we will really need to narrow our focus to get our house renovations finished and get it on the market by July, in the meantime continuing to sell as much as we can.

Life is going to be a bit crazy for a bit, but I am aware of what I need to do to “not over do it”, and everyday I am motivated by this amazing life we have to look forward to.

THIS is what I have been wanting!  To live a life that I feel like writing about everyday!  THIS is what has been brewing in the back of my mind for months now!

Finally!  Life is going to get darn exciting!  Pura Vida indeed!

** Thanks for reading!  This is part of a larger group of blog posts about us letting go of all of our possessions to go traveling.  If you would like to read from the beginning, click here.**

To learn about where I have previously traveled, click here.

To see my blog post menu, click here.

To learn about House Sitting opportunities, and how you can house sit as well, please click here.

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