***Jill’s ‘letting go’ Diary***
This is part of a series of posts (ordered by Dated Titles) where I have recorded my thoughts and emotions as we got rid of all of our possessions, a house, 2 cars, 2 businesses, and tons of STUFF, in order to free ourselves so that we could live a life of travel. From the day that I came up with this idea, to sell everything and travel the world, I have recorded my thoughts, and still am, on certain days where I feel like writing. These are real time, and not edited (except for grammatical corrections). My hope is that my writing inspires you to live your dream. You may not want to do it like we have, but whatever that passion is, grab and hold it and don’t let it go! Xo
We have been here, at our housesitting job for 11 days, and I can honestly say, that I think things are finally sinking in. In the last couple of days, I have looked around and realized, that this place, this adventure, this journey, has finally come to fruition. We are actually here!
We spent 9 months working towards the goal of selling all of our stuff, renovating our house, and unplugging from life. We found out that we had been chosen to do this housesitting job in April, and spent 6 months working our butts off, just to make sure that we got here in time.
And now we are here. And now, I finally have time to reflect on what we have been through.
To say that it’s been a wild ride is an understatement. I don’t think we really gave ourselves time to actually think about what we were doing, as we were doing it. We just did it. We had a goal, and we worked towards it. No questions asked. In fact, this can also be said for how we lived our hectic life. Did we really ever think about what we were doing? I don’t think so, we just did that as well.
I should say though, that I did start to get a restless feeling of “what ARE we doing”, at some point in 2016. I would ask Chris “have you ever considered that there is more to life than this?” He would shrug his shoulders and give me some sort of “What else is there?” kind of answer, but also more of a question. I suppose that my nagging feeling nagged me long enough that what finally came of it on the other side, is this!
Do we regret anything? Not a chance!
As we settle into our routine around here, we are also realizing that we are in a healing process. Some days we feel energetic and ready to take on the world. We do long beach walks, exercise, do yoga and are gung-ho to accomplish things that we had said we would do as soon as we got here. Other days we sleep for a lot of the day, and just relax. Knowing that this is all a process, and that we are on a journey.
When we arrived to Playa Matapalo, we were ecstatic! Neither of us were sure of the location of this house that we were housesitting, other then it’s general area. I suspected it backed onto the beach, but wasn’t 100% sure. In fact, we are about 30 meters from the beach, in a house that far exceeds both of our expectations. It is the perfect sized house for us, and we in fact have a guest room AND spare bathroom. There is a full kitchen, a cozy living room, and wonderful front porch area and even a washing machine! Seriously, down here, we feel like we are living in luxury! Shit, never mind down here! If we lived in this house in Canada, we would feel like we are living in luxury! Minus of course the cold tile floors and lack of double glazed windows……
However, life down here isn’t perfect all of the time. For example we have our water shut off, what seems to be frequently, lately. And there are the odd power outages. Although we have bars on our windows, we still have to make sure that no valuables are close to them at night, as there are the usual neighbourhood thugs (drug addicts we are told) that will stick their hand through and grab whatever they can if it’s of value. The first few nights were a little edgy as I woke up to every weird sound that I heard, worrying that somebody was at the window. But as I have started to realize that we, ourselves, are not actually in any danger, I have started to relax. These people aren’t violent, and out to hurt us, they just try to get anything they can that can be sold or traded for more drugs. And so, we are very diligent with our things, and don’t leave any valuables in sight, or near any windows.
But these ‘problems’, in comparison to the hectic, hamster wheel, crazy, busy -oh so busy- life that we left, really aren’t problems at all. I have actually realized that I would trade that life for any number of other ‘problems’ that we may, or may not encounter down here.
Our (I am referencing ‘our’ as a collective our, as in all North Americans) experience of living in these ‘developing nations’ (I hate these terms!) can be looked at in one of two ways. We can spend our time agonizing on why they don’t do things OUR way, as in how we do it in Canada. Or, we can realize that maybe the things that we worry and stress about back home, really don’t need to be worried about at all.
For example, this whole water being shut off thing. If water was shut off to a neighbourhood in Canada for even 1 hour, without the citizens knowing about it at least a week in advance, there would be absolute massive outcry. Here, like we experienced the other day, the water was shut off for a full 24 hours, with not a word of advance notice!
And guess what? We survived!
The electrical here is what Electricians would call in Canada, an utter nightmare. They have these crazy shower heating units that heat the water on demand, AT the actual shower head. (Not where we are living now, but in every other hostel or Air BnB we have been in so far that actually HAD hot water!) There is a massive knot of wiring that accompanies this device, and it comes right out of the wall, and into the heating unit, with no casing or anything to prevent anyone touching it.
Oh the craziness of it all!!!
But guess what? We survived that as well! And let me tell you, this is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to electrical (un)safety, or at least what we know it to be!
There are so many things that go on in ‘developed’ nations that are just downright ridiculous. We focus our time and energy on these things, rules, instructions, ways of being, as if we actually COULD NOT survive if things weren’t done that way. Rules are made, insurance companies get richer, we run around trying like mad to stay on top of what we are “supposed” to do to fit in with society, and all that is happening, is that we are getting older, and time is slipping by.
Of course, we are still just feeling things out down there, and I am by no means an expert on the Costa Rican way of life. But I can tell for sure, that life is simpler down here. It is peaceful down here.
Anyway, enough ranting about that…….there is a reason, after all, that we have left that all behind. For now, we are focusing on ourselves. We are taking the time to explore our dreams and desires. We are taking the time to figure out what it actually IS that we want to do with our lives. And we are being gentle with ourselves. No more unneeded pressure, no more feelings of HAVING to do things.
The world is an open book, and I intend to read every chapter of it that I can! I will not be told what I SHOULD be doing, I will act on instinct. If it feels right, if it feels GOOD, I will follow that lead.
One of my favourite mottos that I have used for many years is “Life is short, let’s get busy!” Although, I must say that I have definitely left behind a type of “busy” that I never want to encounter again! My busy-ness from here on in, will be an important kind of busy. A busy that I WANT! A busy that I CREATE with care and kindness to myself. No more being busy, just for the sake of it. That is gone now, that is the old me.
And so, I don’t know what else to say, or how else to put it other than – Pura Vida from Costa Rica!
I hope this message finds you HAPPY with your life, EXCITED about your life, and most importantly, INSPIRED by your life.
Thanks for reading!
With these “letting go diary” posts, my aim is to inspire you to find your passion, to nurture it, and to not settle if it isn’t front and foremost in your life. My passion is travelling, and as such, I am to inspire others to travel. If you are interested in travelling, please click on the links below and follow along on our travelling journey. If you are more interested in the act of selling all of our possessions, and want to hear my thoughts on that process, you can go all the way back to the beginning by clicking this link. Alternatively, if you go to my blog post menu, you will be able to click specifically on my “letting go diary” posts.
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